Tempting fate
by TADAHmon
Summary: A tale of some very odd things happening to Arnold when he wishes things were different....


Title: Mere fate  
Author: TaDahmon {Author of 28 other stories}  
Summary: If things were so empty for Arnold, what would happen if he had a chance at everything he THOUGHT he ever wanted....?:  
  
Arnold walked down an empty corridor, taking a deep breath. Things had felt so empty for him for so long, he wasn't sure if he was any better than this very corridor he was staring down. Sure, his job was... amazing.... but.... being a scientist was only so good. What about a wife? Children? That's why, when he wasn't working, he and a collegue worked on finding a portal into another world where things were much better for them. They had been trying for almost a month but now Arnold thought that they had it: Gerald had found a slight problem in the flux and was working on it. Now all he had to do was wait until his day at work was over. When he started spacing out during a meeting, his boss waved a hand in front of his face.   
  
"Hey! Arnold!"  
  
"Huh?" He went a little red. "I'm sorry, Phoebe. What?"  
  
"Listen, Arnold," his short friend said, "why don't you take the day off? I can tell you have something on your mind. The last thing I need is a pre-occupied football head working."  
  
"Have you been talking to Helga lately?" he asked, smiling a little.  
  
"Well," she smiled. "Yes."  
  
"And how is she?"  
  
"Ah, she's ok. Hopefully she pays more attention to her job than you do."  
  
Arnold blinked. "What kind of job does she have?"  
  
"She works as an assistant. She tells me it's just till she gets that big break." Phoebe paused and smiled a little. "Now, go."  
  
"Yes, ma'am," he said and started gathering his stuff. As he slung his coat over his arm, he turned and smiled. "Thanks, Phoebe."  
  
"No problem."  
  
Nodding, he then ran out. This was perfect. Now he could go to Gerald's and see how the portal was. They had kept it in Gerald's small apartment because no one, not even the landlord, ever bothered to go there. Bursting in through the door that stuck for a second, he panted and called out, "Gerald!?"  
  
"In here, Man! Brainy almost has it set up."  
  
"Oh, wait for me!" Arnold threw his coat onto the floor and rushed into Gerald's bedroom. The three men then stood around a small circle of metal. Brainy, who was still skinny and had on thick glasses, pressed buttons on a small remote, trying to get it to work. Finally, a hum sounded.   
  
"Go," Brainy wheezed.  
  
Arnold and Gerald did a thumb wriggle quickly and then leapt onto the pad, feeling suddenly like they had lost all sense of gravity.  
------  
  
When Arnold finally felt like he wasn't spinning, he opened his eyes and looked around. He was in the middle of the city and Gerald wasn't with him anymore. Shrugging, Arnold walked towards a place he knew well, the hospital. He visited there often because Lila had become a nurse years ago. Walking up to the receptionist desk, he waited momentarilly, tapping his fingers on the soft wood until finally a nurse walked up to him.  
  
"How can I help you?"  
  
"Ah, I was searching for someone you have working here. Lila Williams?"  
  
"Lila? Oh, dear. She worked here for a few months, yes, but she quit."  
  
"Quit, why?" he repeated, incredulous.  
  
"Why, it just hurt her too much when her husband died."  
  
"Her husband? Who was her husband?"  
  
"Some sweet young man named Arnold Williams. It was really too unfortunate."  
  
"Arn.... Me!?" he whispered. "What happened to him?"  
  
"Why, he was in the gulf war. His plane was knocked from the sky and his body was never found."  
  
"Oh..." 'I need Gerald!' he thought. "Thanks!" he exclaimed, suddenly running.  
  
Arnold rushed out of the hospital, bumping right into his black best friend.  
  
"Arnold, man, there you are. I've been looking all over... What's up?" he asked, noticing his friend's look of excitement.  
  
"Gerald! They think I'm dead! Lila's my widow!"  
  
Gerald started to speak but then paused. "Man, I'm starting to think you're looney. What's good about that?"  
  
"I can come back and reclaim my spot! I can be happy here!"  
  
Gerald blinked. "Well, all right, man, I'll help you."  
  
"Thanks!"  
-----  
  
Gerald paused outside of the FBI building, staring at Arnold. "So, you died in the gulf war? And we're supposed to say that, since your body wasn't found, you were a P.O.W.?"  
  
"Yeah. C'mon, if they don't believe it, we can leave through the portal."  
  
Gerald groaned. "Ok, ok. I'm going." He walked slowly into the room, staring at an FBI agent. "Uh, hello," he said, suddenly speaking in a falsetto. Clearing his throat, he tried again, in his usual deep voice. "Hello."  
  
"Well, hello, hello, to you too," the agent said.  
  
"I have some info about a P.O.W."  
  
"Ok.... And that involves me how?"  
  
"Did you know of a man believed to be killed in action from around here by the name of Arnold Williams?" Gerald asked.  
  
"Williams... Oh yes. That was unfortunate," the hardened agent admitted.  
  
"Not quite. Agent, please meet Arnold Williams." At this, Arnold walked in and smiled a little.  
  
The agent dropped some papers that were in his hands and gaped.   
  
"Hi," Arnold said sheepishly.  
  
"Mrs. Williams is going to be thrilled," the agent breathed. "What took you so long to get back here?"  
  
"He was in very frail health. We were lucky to get him out of enemy's hands when we did."  
------  
  
Later that evening, Arnold paused outside of a house-- his house, the house he had with Lila. Thoughts of the loneliness from his past life escaped him and he walked up to the door. Nervously, he cleared his throat and knocked.  
  
An almost thirty year old red head opened the door and stared at Arnold. Her eyes welled with tears and she grabbed the door as if to shut the door but suddenly Arnold wrapped his arms around her and kissed her.  
  
"I'm home, Lila, I'm home."  
  
"I- I thought my mind was playing tricks on me," she sobbed, resting her head against his shirt. "It's done it before...."  
  
"I'm sorry..."  
  
For a week, things went great between the two. They didn't even have to worry about if the Gerald from this world and the Gerald from the other world would see each other because this Gerald lived in England.  
  
Lila, however, was slowly becoming suspicious. Arnold didn't remember anything about their married years. It was odd. She started asking him certain things about their marriage just to test him.  
-------  
  
Arnold walked from the grocery store towards his house when suddenly he was knocked back by a sudden explosion. Standing up, he was amazed to see that the building that the teleporter pad had been hid in had detonated. "What happened?"  
  
"They demolished the building. It looks pretty shabby, huh? Pieces all over the sidewalk..." a guy said, rolling his blue eyes.  
  
"Yeah...." Inside, he felt happy. There was no way he could be sent back to his old home now-- not that he wanted to-- but now he could stay in this world forever and act like the other cold and lonely world didn't even exist.  
  
That evening, things went very bad. He walked into his house and saw it was empty. A note on the counter in the kitchen said, "I'm out for the day; please don't stay in the house." Shrugging, he threw the note away and continued on to the living room.  
  
Suddenly, a voice yelled out, "Freeze!"  
  
Turning, Arnold came face to face with a somewhat chubby police officer who was holding a 9 magnum in his hand. Blinking, Arnold held his hands up over his head and watched as the red headed man walked towards him and started rubbing his hands over his pockets, feeling for a weapon. "What's going on?!" the confused blonde yelled.  
  
"Heh, you're going into the jail for impersonating, buddy. Our sarge isn't too stupid. He checked you out. No P.O.W.s by the name of Arnold Williams was taken. Our intelligence woulda told us."  
  
Arnold grunted as handcuffs were roughly slapped on his wrists. Seeing a streak of red in the corner of his eye, he turned in time to see Lila. "Lila! Help!"  
  
"I can't believe you lied to me!" she sobbed. "I thought you were my husband! I think they should shoot you here and now!" She then ran out and the police officer used his nightstick to poke Arnold in the back repeatedly until he started to walk.  
-----  
  
At the police station, he heard a woman screaming at the police. "Let me go! I'm the real Helga Pataki!"  
  
"No you ain't!" a police officer screamed back. "What is it with impersonators lately!?"  
  
Arnold looked around and saw a tall blonde woman sitting in a metal chair, angerly yelling at the officer standing in front of her.  
  
"Hey, Charlie, let's go get some donuts and calm down, eh?" the officer standing by Arnold suggested. "These two.... Eh.... We'll be watching in the next room. If you move, we'll shoot, understand?"  
  
Arnold was silent but Helga looked a little fearful, her unibrow in a V shape. When they finally left, Arnold whispered, "Helga?"  
  
She glanced over at him finally and took in the shape of his head... "Arnold!? How did you get here?" she hissed.  
  
"A portal..."  
  
"Really? Same here... My friend Brainy had one...."  
  
"Brainy? He created mine, too...."  
  
"Oh brother," she muttered.  
  
"So are you gonna get out of here?"   
  
"I think so. You?"  
  
"I dunno." He glanced over at her just when she was staring at him and their eyes lingered for a minute before the police officers re-entered the room.  
  
"Oooh, Ms. Pataki," Charlie taunted, "the real Ms. Pataki ain't filing charges so we're letting you off with a warning."  
  
"As for you, your wife did file," the other cop laughed at Arnold. "So in you go."  
  
Helga walked slowly out of the building and walked to the other side where the holding cell was. She pulled out a small pen from her purse and whispered, "Brainy, you do think of everything." She grabbed a small box that someone had put up there and put it underneath the window, staring at the metal bars that crossed the windows horizontally. Silently, she climbed on the box and, twisting off the lid, winced as a hot flame shot from where a pen would usually be. Slowly it burned through the metal. After almost an hour, she had two of the bars melted through completely so quietly, Arnold hadn't noticed till she missed and burned her own finger and cursed in pain. Another hour passed and she had the other bar melted and one other almost burned.  
  
"Ohhhhh Mr. Williamssssssss...." Charlie taunted. "We might release you soon and take you for a drive-- to the big jail right on the outskirts of toooown."  
  
Arnold groaned and didn't look at the melted bars until Charlie had left. When he finally did, the window was completely open. Silently cheering, he climbed up onto a cot that was sloppily made in the corner right below the window. He was just tall enough to get his hands into the window and, using the small parts of the bars as a gripping post, pulled himself up. Helga gripped his arms and helped pull him over until they both went flying out of the window and down to the ground. Somehow, Helga landed on him and they laughed. Growing solemn, they stood up and started running down one street and up the other. It was late at night so not many people were awake and they were looking for a quick hiding place. They had heard sirens behind them so they knew it had been discovered that he was gone.  
  
"Arnold! Here! Call Gerald!" Helga yelled, out of breath, suddenly throwing her cell phone at him. "Tell him to meet us at-- that computer store on 5th Avenue!"  
  
Arnold caught it and did so, seeing her plan. "Are we--"  
  
"Just call!" she screeched as they continued running.  
------  
  
About ten minutes later, they arrived at the computer store. A glowing sign said "losed." The C had died out long ago.  
  
Helga held out her fire pen and started melting away at the lock. It melted as easy as the metal bars. When they were finally in, the burgular alarm started but it didn't matter-- the police were already there. As the three rushed in, Gerald and Helga worked together to barricade the door. Arnold walked forward and grabbed a bunch of metal and some electricity wires that were laying around. After pushing a thick wooden table and a book case up to the door, Gerald and Helga joined him, ignoring the sounds of the police trying to burst through the windows or the door.  
  
Arnold licked his lips and started adding a timer to the wires, holding it all together with cellophane. He pulled it over to an outlet and plugged it in, praying that the timer would start up. Suddenly, it flickered and came on with ten seconds. "You go," Arnold told Gerald. "Go!"  
  
"You sure, Man?"  
  
"Go!" Helga yelled and pushed him onto it as the counter went from 2 to 1 and then to 0. Electricity lit up the room and Gerald was gone.  
  
Arnold reset the timer and looked up as the police started ramming the door. "Go, Helga."  
  
"Ah, no, you go," she said nervously.  
  
"Go!" he said, "I can go last!"  
  
"Oh, Arnold!" she yelled as, suddenly, the door broke down. "Ok, fine!" she groaned and ran up to it as it ticked away. 5... 4.... 3.... Suddenly, she grabbed him by the arm and, falling down, pushed him on top of her. 2.... 1... 0.... They were gone!  
  
Gerald was standing there. "Man! We did it! We're home!"   
  
Arnold tilted his head. "Are you sure?"  
  
"Sure I'm sure!" Gerald grinned. "What are you two doin'!?" he teased.  
  
Arnold looked down and realized he was still on top of Helga. Blushing, he jumped up and grinned sheepishly. "Sorry, Helga."  
  
"Sure," she grumbled, feigning anger as she stood up and briskly dusted off her pink shirt.  
  
"Heh-heh, see ya, man, I'm going to see Phoebe."  
  
"Ok, see ya Gerald." They thumb wriggled and the black haired man sauntered off.  
  
"So... Helga...."  
  
"Yeah?"  
  
"Wanna go to dinner? I know I'm hungry."  
  
"Well, I guess." She smiled however and, as he grabbed her hand, they walked off.   
  
Maybe it didn't have to be lonely and cold in this old world....  
  
The end. 


End file.
